Critical reflection allows nurses to engage in professional and personal development through self-evaluation and self-assessment after analyzing a situation. Carper’s (1978) Fundamental Patterns of Knowing in Nursing have five ways of knowing which integrates a holistic approach to the nursing profession. This assignment aims to adopt Carer’s (1978) ways of knowing to critically reflect upon an event that occurred during my clinical experience.
I have chosen to reflect on an incident that occurred on Unit 3B at the Pasqua Hospital involving myself, my Preceptor, and another registered nurse. One of the patients on my team was diagnosed with endometrial cancer with metastases to right leg bone, muscle, sacrum, and pelvis. She was a very petite lady, who was only 54 years old with three children and a husband. The patient was declining so much every day, but her husband, who was the patient’s main caregiver, was not ready to give up the hope. The patient accepted her current state and was more than capable of making her own decisions about her health and informed the nurses and the physicians that she does not want to suffer anymore and would not like to receive any treatment if she declines even more. Even though the patient voiced her wishes, her husband was not able to accept the patient’s wishes and he would not let the patient to change her code status. When I was informed about this from the day nurses, I was trying to understand how we were going to have the patient’s husband to understand patient’s wish. I can understand both the patient’s side and patient’s husband side. It is very difficult to let your loved ones to not to receive all the treatments and to hold on to that strand of hope that everything will be okay despite their current state. It was very heartbreaking to see what the patient and her family members were going through. The patient reminded me of my aunt, who passed away from cancer around same age as the patient, also leaving her husband and her three children. So, anytime I was in the patient’s room, I tried to push my emotions away, and tried my best not to see her as my aunt. It was difficult for me to provide care to this patient because of my own experienc. When I came back to the unit the week after, we found out that she developed shingles, and she was really declining. I was trying very hard not to get emotional last week, but when I found out she was getting transferred to my team, I could not hold my emotions back. So, after the report, I had to ask my Preceptor and my partner if it was okay for me to take a short break. It was important for me to take some time to gather my thoughts because it helped me to understand my emotions and clear my mind so that I can provide a safe to my patient. It is also oaky to debrief with your Preceptor or partner on how you are feeling and what you are going through, so they could provide you with the support you may need.
